27/365 – “Myself” nr.27

27/365 – “Myself” nr.27, a photo by Luca Rossini on Flickr.

Sony RX1, 35mm f2 Carl Zeiss
ISO100, f/14, 1/125, raw
400W strobe at subject’s left, 120x80cm soft-box
400w strobe behind the mirror, 60x60cm soft-box
400w strobe at subject’s left, aiming the mirror, 60x60cm soft-box

I’m back at me. Now looking at my image in the mirror. In my environment. At my job. Here I am.
I am not my body, but I’ll always need one, my look is not unique, I’ll never be slim, I’ll always have a dark side, I’ll never be a suit, I’ll always think as an engineer, I’ll always dream as a child, and I’ll keep being as long as my heart will beat.
I’m not the tools I use, but I’ll always need them, and in the right order, because I’ll never stop drinking a coffee first thing in the morning, staying hyper-connected all day long, burning calories when possible, eating good, loving cameras, and sleeping tight.
And I am not the people I love, but I’m glad I have so many, and they will always be a polarized mirror through which I’ll be able to better see myself.
I am none of these things, and yet I’m all of them. I am nothing. I am everything. My existence doesn’t make the littlest difference for the whole universe, and yet to me the whole universe is there solely because I exist.
A few posts back I said that I am the interaction of my body with my environment, that is, the projection of my body’s needs, actions, and interactions onto the surrounding world. Perceive, react, understand. But my perception of the world comes through a geometrical and emotional projection of the surroundings onto my body. So, my understanding of myself must come through a triple projection, which means that, at best, I can approach myself as a reality at its third round of transformation. Where things get pretty blurry.